Obligatory this happened a few weeks ago.
My husband and I have been together for 13 years. I have no idea how this started really, but I've been powdering and rubbing his balls for years now. It is just something that we do. It's weirdly comforting and puts us both to sleep. Plus, who doesn't like freshly powdered balls instead of gross swamp balls? Not to mention the wonders it does for chafing.
Anyway, one day I can't find the powder for our 2 yr old's butt. No biggie. I go to the store to get more, but I figured I could get Man powder too. A nice smelling one that just smells like... Man. NOT the after work gross man smell... this is what we are trying to get rid of my dudes. So I get a new powder for him and just regular ol' Johnson's for the baby. It'll be a nice surprise for when he comes home since he's been working out of town.
Here's my fuck up...
I DID NOT READ THE LABEL PROPERLY. I saw that it said "Absorbing. Cooling. Refreshing." I saw that it said "...odor + wetness control..." and just thought of how awesome it would be for him to not have swamp balls. Being a bit of an airhead, it did not occur to me to read further into that.
So fast forward a few days later to when husband finally comes home from working out of town. Night rolls around and we're in bed. My husband asks for Powder and Ball Rubs. After a full week, without his wife to powder his balls for him, I say "no prob. I got you, boo." I bust out the new Men's Essentials Man Powder. It smells good. I dig it. I turn around to put it away and he asks me what I put on him. I turn back to him and can see he's clearly uncomfortable. I look at the label and see that the cooling effect comes from menthol. Now, I feel awful at this point, but honestly, I can't stop laughing. He's complaining its like IcyHot so I tell him to take a shower and see if that works. He hops in the shower and washes his balls. Nope. He is still feeling it. I'm still laughing at my poor husbands predicament that I created by trying to buy him something new for his balls. I ended up using the Johnson's on him, but he was still uncomfortable. I felt pretty bad about it, despite laughing like a hyena the entire time.
That night he said I should post this here, but I wanted to surprise him so I've waited. I do still powder his balls when he's home. I am going to stick with Johnson's Baby Powder though.
Babe, if you are reading this, I am very sorry for causing your balls discomfort, but it was so damn funny. I love you. Sorry for being an airhead some times.
TL;DR TIFU by powdering my husband's balls with powder that made him feel like he had IcyHot on his balls.
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